Beware the hat
I may or may not have mentioned that when out in Aus some years ago I picked up the phrase whilst out driving with my expat friend – beware the hat.
Inquiring after the meaning, I was informed it referred to any one driving a closed topped car who wore a hat, in particular it referred to hoons, young people who drive like idiots all of whom seem to wear hats and elderly drivers who it would appear either wear a hat all the time indoors or out and don’t realise it’s there until bedtime and then not always and those who like the hoons only wear a hat when driving in a closed top car.
Of course once having been informed of the relevant facts, one’s eyes immediately start to notice all people that fall into that category and take the necessary defensive driving actions when encountering them. This sadly has stayed with me since those now somewhat distant days and I still on occasions can be heard in a car muttering “beware the hat” when appropriate, but I have to admit that apart from viewing from far some strange and potentially dangerous driving from these poor souls who wear hats in cars it has never personally had a direct effect on me, until now.
On a visit to the local surgery to collect an ever larger consignment of medication for my dear wife I turned into the surgery car park entrance just in time to see a car parked sideways starting to move out across the entrance. I stopped as until he went out, there was no way in and so I waited.
After much deliberation and slow wheel turning he (I’d ascertained it was a he by now) managed to mount the opposite kerb and came to a halt, with the window wound down I could see a slightly bemused look on the elderly driver’s face and got out of the car to see if I could help relieve the now increasing log jam.
The elderly driver also got out to see what his predicament was – there was no predicament that wasn’t solved by simply reversing – and I realised that he was wearing a hat – the tweedy type worn by people who shoot.
I asked if he needed help but he replied that he just wanted to see if he had caused any damage and wandered round the vehicle, found nothing and got back in his car, putting his hat back on as he did so, then proceeded to forward reverse several times and finally disappeared to wherever people who wear hats in cars go to.
Filed under: History & Culture, Humour, Wiggia
It’s either Bozos, Old People or People who wear Hats.
1. Bozos: These are the clowns who are blind in the brain, they go along for three miles with the right hand winker going, then turn left in front of you without signalling.
2. Old People: Ohhh these glasses and hearing aid dont suit me, I can drive as well as when I took the test (1928)
Oh, what was that thump, did I hit something (yes you tossbag, me!)
3. People who wear Hats: There’s a mindset to these dorks, as long as they have the hat on, nothing can possibly go wrong, everyone else will blithely get out of their way and nothing can possibly be their fault.
I’m trying to imagine one of these on a motorbike.
elderly drivers who it would appear either wear a hat all the time indoors or out and don’t realise it’s there until bedtime
….you talking about me?
in mitigation –
a bald head and cold air blowing from the vents across the windscreen do not mix….
===
…northern chap goes shopping with his mate to buy a new cap. Having purchased said item they set off home with new cap in store’s bag.
It starts to rain.
Northern chap’s mate says “aren’t you going to wear your cap?”
To which norther chap replies “What! And sit in the house with a wet cap on!!”
sorry, couldn’t resist it
I couldn’t resist this one as it always conjures up visions as suggested by Robert, the problem is I am already in that other age group though luckily I have so far felt no inclination to don a headpiece when in a car ! but as always life is stranger than fiction , having just had a shower on this rarely hot day I emerge and looking out of the upstairs window over the neighbors drive espy the elder son 20+ getting in his car to go out wearing – you guessed it – a hat not an ordinary hat but a woolen beany hat, just the job when driving a Peugeot 204 , pale blue late dark blue with a silly exhaust in 80 degree heat, I give up.
It’s been a rule of thumb of mine for yonks: the behatted are a menace on the roads. And elsewhere too.
Trilby’s what y’all need.
I am rather partial to hats and I am certain I am not a menace on the roads or anywhere else for that matter
http://www.flickr.com/photos/-cherrypie-/3357804140/
http://www.flickr.com/photos/-cherrypie-/866158893/
http://www.flickr.com/photos/-cherrypie-/3241267386/
And I am not quite of that age group
Oh dear that’s me done for. A bozo, dork and very very old….sigh!
I wear my hat in the car in the winter ‘cos I’m too lazy to take it off, put it on the back seat and then have to try and find it again to put it on before exiting my car, especially if it is raining (outside the car that is).
Also putting it on in the car is a performance in itself as there’s not much room between my head and the roof being nearly 6′ tall. And the mirrors just aren’t big enough for a lady to see properly so she doesn’t get out of the car looking like a complete dork
Oh, and it musses up my hair to take it off just to drive. As for my driving, a hat makes no damn difference. There you go, open season on the insults about lady drivers in Beamers.
And don’t talk to me about putting my coat/jacket/cardy on in the car either after it’s been hung up on a hangar on the grab handle. I do at least put it on the nearside of the car (so it doesn’t reduce visiblity) but then trying to reach it is a stretch….lol Why do I do that? So it doesn’t get creased – women eh!
You are sooo right, I also heard of the hat rule.
Overcoats I was told are another warning sign, especially on nice days and especially ones with real of faux fur collars worn by passengers apparently.
Cherie – thanks for those.
Rossa – you’re a lady. You’re allowed a hat [or is that being misogynist], ladies?
Moggsy – oh yes, the fur lined.
Rossa, If I have to take a jacket type top I generally put it on a hanger and hang it (covered if I can) on the thingy behind me when I am driving. Sometimes I lay stuff like a longer coat carefully on the back seat, maybe (good tip) in a big binliner or a zip up thingy. Hats on back seat and protected by bin liner, maybe also shoes (better for hair if you put it on after you get out I think). Lighter materials can get really creased if you wear it to drive in.
Open top vehicles are a no-no.
Hair? What’s that?
Moggsy….”maybe also shoes (better for hair if you put it on after you get out I think)”
I usually wear shoes on my feet, thanks
OK so maybe “also shoes” should be _after_ the brackets? ^_^ No way is it safe or sensible to wear a good sized hat when driving, something with a brim and feathers, or silk flowers.
http://www.ladydianehats.com/sitebuilder/images/Kentucky_Derby_Hats-315×274.jpg
http://www.ladydianehats.com/Feathermania.html
This is getting to be like Womans Journal tips on safe driving with a hat !!!!
That’s what happens when the ladies seize control of the blog.
As someone with no hair, I wear a hat in cold weather, or in the sun; it has no bearing on my driving, where I may or may not have a hat.
I never wear a hat indoors; I was raised that you take your hat off when you enter someone’s house, or when you are sitting somewhere in public, such as a restaurant. If I had come to the dinner table wearing a hat as a youngster, my dad would have probably knocked it off my head and given me a lecture on manners.
That’s right – only ladies can keep their hats on indoors.
Let us not exclude the modern equivalent: the dreaded ‘hoodie’.
Drivers wearing a hoodie [over their head] whilst driving – or pedalling a bicycle – are as bad as ye olde manne …
For Rossa and Moggsy, the only way to go.
http://youtu.be/BR0oZ2pnhyg