nourishing obscurity

So the inevitable is happening and Elin Nordegren is moving out.

In terms of the prenups, she has every right and morally she does too.  As many have pointed out, a leopard doesn’t change its spots, as Shane Warne showed in Australia.  As my mate in Russia said, once is a mistake, twice is a system.  I’d change that to “twice is a mistake, the third time is a system”.

The fact that this marriage is based on money and that Woods clearly felt he could buy her with $55m either shows his complete misunderstanding about what love is or else he had good reason to feel it might do the trick.  Money seems to have done it so far.

The worry is that she’s trying to renegotaiate the prenup now to get more cash.  She hardly needs the sympathy of the world and is planning to live in her native land and yet how good a move is that?  How many more millions does she want out of him?

She was a model and did well but the only reason she’s in the comfortable position she currently is is because he lifted her to superstardom.  She was willing to go along with that.  I saw a similar thing with Satsuki Mitchell and Daniel Craig.

They had a prenup and that is all about such situations as this.  She never tried to get it changed before.  She needs to not be another Heather Mills or it might come down on her.

However, that’s not what this post is about.  This post is about Rachel Uchitel and one or two of the others.

Behind the scenes, however, alleged mistress Rachel Uchitel is getting a slightly different message. The very first woman publicly connected to the married golfer has confided in friends that Woods remains in contact with her to this day. “They are not over,” a Uchitel source insists in the new issue of Us Weekly.

The source reports that Uchitel very recently admitted that “Tiger was texting her, trying to find time to get together again. He wasn’t even fazed!”

Although Uchitel was “disgusted” by reports of 13 other women (besides his wife) allegedly involved with her man, the Manhattanite coincidentally showed up Dec. 14 in West Palm Beach, Fla. — within spitting distance of Woods’ $22 million yacht, Privacy.

This is going to sound strange coming from your humble corespondent but I feel a bit sorry for Rachel Uchitel because I’ve known women in this position before – I was even cuckolded by one. I’ve talked to a few and one, in Russia, I took to the cafe many times and we talked it through.

This latter girl had gone for the successful sportsman, the hero and counted it a notch in the belt to be associated with him but as my own gf and I knew full well – he was cheating on her, telling her sweet nothings to keep her just this side of unhappy and then doing as he wanted in other places the team travelled.

In the end, she worked it out and it ended but she still had that feeling for her big strong hero that the Russians call a kumir.  This is the madness of women in still hankering after a Woods or a Warne [and this theme is in my second book in the first chapter] and in men hankering after the beautiful femme fatale – it’s a fool’s game.

Does anyone doubt that Rachel Uchitel has feelings for him?  Does anyone doubt that he keeps her hanging on?  Possibly needing a sympathetic ear and she has the most sympathetic ear around.  They might even end up together as a couple for real.

What we have here is a woman, EN who had a right to expect fidelity from that man but Uchitel, with her own feelings for him, was willing to drop any principles she had in order to secure him.  The things Woods told her were exactly, almost word for word, what a cheater told a girl of whom I am very fond.  He told her that his marriage was almost over, that his wife didn’t understand him and was only interested in money, he told her all of those things and what did the vanity of a woman do?

It convinced her that she could make all the difference, that he had just been with the wrong woman and she was now the right one for the situation.  She fell into the age old female trap of thinking she could change a man.  No woman can ever change a man in the long term.  She can change him in the interim, that’s all.  No man I know ever tried to change a woman’s nature – they just withdrew from communication and changed the woman in the end, with much gnashing of teeth and weeping.

The moment anyone, male or female, thinks it’s OK to take a man or woman away from the family on the strength of a sob story and professions of love, he/she is under delusion.  Perhaps it was bad in the Woods marriage, based on money as it seems to have been.  Who knows?  What is for sure is that Rachel was most certainly a factor and in not telling him to work it out, thrash it out with EN, she was doing great wrong for selfish reasons.

And did she really believe that she was so special that he wouldn’t do the same to her one day?  She should look at Henry VIII and Anne Boleyn.

I’m still cogitating on what my ex-gf said to me: “We’re all the same deep down.”  This is also what Menken said:  “Love is the delusion that one woman differs from another.”

I happen to believe that there are differences but there are also similarities women don’t wish to acknowledge.  Ditto with men.  Self-delusion is common to both and Rachel Uchitel is on a hiding to nothing.  If she wants to find happiness, she stands a better chance finding it with a non-cheater but the problem is that a non-cheater won’t go with her unless he has already separated on long term grounds.

She’s caught between a rock and a hard place and is a slave to her feelings for him.

Filed under: Society & human issues